Chronicles Of An Adopted Child #1 – Semioné Abi

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34 Responses

  1. Kany T. Dahl says:

    Something tells me Celine wasn’t really preggy. Just said that to get her parents to let she and Tom be.
    A nice start to what I believe will be a great story…Sally doesn’t bring trash here. More grease to your joints @Semione Abi

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  2. olaide says:

    9c start to wat I blv will be an awesome story

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  3. harrison says:

    Itz a nice write-up! Keep it up,but you must have read the other stories of the other writers and sally on this blog, So I suggest you make your stories Longer! Thanks

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  4. etoros says:

    nice but reads too much like a fairy tale and no catchy scenario to make me want more.

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  5. imotolab2014i says:

    hi Mr Abi, this was a good read but i think the descriptions was a tad too much. its like documenting everything step by step which makes it seem kinda monotonous. at a point i decided to jump and read what exactly was going on. this said this and this said this and this den decided this. i hope u get my point. but well mayb its allowed since its chronicled. and also may i ask if this story is from the viewpoint of a child? looking forward to reading more. please do make it longer.

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    • Semione Abi says:

      Hi @imotolab. thanks for the tip, but like you said, its chronicled, so i didn’t want to leave any action out. The story is from a view point of life .. A family life because all of them played a vital role. You’ll get to see that along the line. But thanks xo…….hope to continue hearing from you

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  6. theodora says:

    nice story line.

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  7. Phortunate says:

    We are keeping our fingers crossed.n

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  8. Haleemah says:

    It has the beginnings of a great story but needs some work. Is it a narrative? Stick to either present continuous or past tenses. Do not mix both. And try to mind the correct use of catch-phrases and quotation marks. More power to your elbow.

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  9. wumi says:

    Nice start

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  10. rakiya says:

    Very nice,really enjoyed it

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  11. peachesgurl says:

    You gotta read between the lines… I can see a story here. I hav a feeling that aunt mirabel might be the mother. Whr is mum and dad when she got home from sch?! etc hmmmmm. Sally dear, you no dey disappoint. Kudos!

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  12. Adeleke Julianah says:

    I’m so glad you bring this story here Sally.
    Been following it on 360Nobs before.
    But along the line, they stopped. Thanks for bringing it here. So glad you did…

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    • Semione Abi says:

      thanks @Juliana. when Sally left 360nobs the posting process became slower…but they’ve not stopped it, i sent them the latest episode last week, waiting for them to publish it. But thank you so much for following the story….i hope it has been gud so far

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  13. kenny says:

    Nice story line but som parts was nt jst workin for mi ,like d part of Celina’s parents.But can’t wait to know if Celina was truly pregnant.

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  14. Winicares says:

    something tells me its going to be a nice read, thanks for sharing this with us @ Sally feat Semione. but Sally let me warn u dont play that ojoro council u played us in Unfulfilled promise

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  15. Doyin says:

    its interestin

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  16. toyenlon says:

    Nice one, looking forward for more.

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  17. Noreen says:

    Hi dear. It’s a big step deciding to write and for the public at that. Well done! However, you have some work to do. There is inconsistency in your tenses, some subject-verb disagreement and confusing punctuations (quotation marks). Still, keep it up.

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  18. amina says:

    It’s very interesting,can’t wait for the rest episodes.

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  19. Oladayo says:

    Good write up. But I think some of the stuffs Marie says is too intelligent for a 6 year old well except you’re trying to play her as a genius but usually 6 year olds don’t speak so great English. However, it takes a good writer to have the confidence to show his write ups to the public so Great Job!

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    • Semione Abi says:

      Thanks @Oladayo!!!! Marie is six years old but acts older than her age….that’s the way she was brought up….along the line you’ll get to know what I’m talking about…..just keep reading….thanks!!!!

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