Guys, haveyou ever wondered what goes on in the minds of females after sex? Ever wondered if all they’re thinking about is how good you were? You hook up with this girl and things get really steamy and you end up in bed and do the deed and it’s over. The first question you guys always ask is: did you like it? And the answer you’ll always get is ‘yes’ but seriously are you sure she’s telling you the truth? Are you really sure it’s a yes deep inside in her mind? Wonder no more. I’ll reveal what usually goes on in a female’s mind after sex.
- Where is this leading? Unlike guys who can have sex and leave it at sex, a girl wants something more meaningful. If you did not make it clear to each other before you got down that the sex would be a onetime thing, then she’ll be wondering if there’s going to be another encounter. She’s also speculating if it is leading to something serious. Once a woman opens her legs for you, there’s a chance that she’s opening her heart too. Yes, we know about girls who seem to be experts in opening only their legs but I’m assuming you don’t do hoes and that’s why I’m writing this. So first thing she’s thinking: where is this leading?
- Did I just make a mistake? She knows little about you and she just slept with you. The heat of the moment has worn off and she is now left with the thoughts in her head and her conscience. She is wondering if she has just played the whore, if she let you in too quickly. What are you thinking about her? How do you see her? As cheap? As easy? She wants to know how you feel about her and that is why she cuddles. She wants to see if you have any feelings besides what your little man gave her. If you go to sleep or even have a shower immediately afterwards, you just showed her that she’s inconsequential and you’re irritated about the sex.
- Will he tell his friends? Girls know that you guys always brag about your conquests. But no sensible woman would want to be the trending topic on the table of men. It is rightly assumed that any lady who is discussed amongst men as regards to her sex life has been devalued. So she fears about this and is wondering if you will take the gist outside.
- What did I do wrong? She looks around and studies the environment for markers that she screwed up somewhere. Maybe her panties were not so clean. Maybe you spotted the stretchmarks on her bum. Maybe she had been too loud and the neighbors heard. Maybe she doesn’t smell right. All these little worries cross her mind. You should try not to leave her to her thoughts.
- Was it good for him? And finally the important question comes in. Did he like it? Did I perform well? Am I top on his list? Will we do this again? Believe it or not, girls also want to rock their men’s beds as you want to rock ours. Girls who lie stiffly are fast-fading. But note that a girl might go easy the first time as she might not want to be seen as knowing too much of sex. You will enjoy her better when she trusts you enough and all the above questions have been answered and she has no issues. To get a better second performance, make her feel at ease. Laugh and tease and she’ll take the lead.
- What the heck did I just do? This happens when the sex went bad. You came too fast, you kept stabbing into her like a robot, you did not emotionally attend to her, she wasn’t aroused, you grunted too loudly… guy, you were just a total failure. Or it could be that you showed your A-hole side by ignoring her after the act. No woman wants that. We want to feel appreciated and shown affection but you turn around and snore like a warthog. You’re not only showing you don’t care, you’re also showing that you made a mistake sleeping with her and trust me, she’s thinking the same.
- I want this to be permanent. Now, if you gave her the best time of her life and attended to her emotionally, then this would be the first thought on her mind. Forget everything you read above, this knocks them all down. She would be wanting to have a permanent fixture in your life. She thinks of breakfast in bed and wants to surprise you with it, so she might ask where your kitchen is just to spy if there are ingredients for that breakfast. She looks around your bedroom and wonders how her life can fit into yours. She plans to dash home the next morning to return with a toothbrush and a towel, just to be sure that the good thing she received would be waiting when she returns. She asks you to have a shower with her because it is a bonding experience for her. And then she asks you for something to sleep in, wanting you to hand her your shirt or t-shirt… all of this with a smile on her face that will extend unto the next morning.
Brother, if you’ve gotten to that point, then you did something good. Better still, if she was the one who went to sleep snuggled in your arms, then congratulations! You hit the mark and you don’t need to worry about how you performed.
You really got it right ma’am….
And we’re also thinking if the guy has hidden camera somewhere. you can’t trust guys these days 😉
But hey, that’s a thot. Can’t be too careful these days.
Thanks Sally for deciphering this thing. sumtin like this happened to me last week. the girl was so quiet after we did it that I was scared that I did something wrong. next tin na so the babe enter bathroom they do fone call dey tell her friends say ‘I hit the spot’ anyway, I felt good in a long time
Lol! Good for you. Hope u guys are together though.
What more can I say, you’ve said it all. We ladies can easily get emotionally attached to a guy after sex, and really can’t help but wonder about all the things you’ve mentioned with so much guilt. I do hope the male folks will understand this somehow. I’m glad I read this, very lovely piece Sally, well done!
Thank you, Gloria. These are basic things the average woman worries about. The first time I had sex with my husband, I already saw our future, even though he told me “hey, it’s just sex”. A few months down the line he was still saying “it’s just sex” but was “loving” me. I allowed him deceive himself until the L word popped out accidentally one day and he claimed it was a slip up, said in the heat of the moment. Well, look at us today.
So yes, we females get emotional and we attach ourselves too quickly. Good or bad? I don’t know. It worked for me though.
Thanks for reading.
Lmaooo! Slip up? Heat of the moment? Rooiiiiiiight!
You’ve captured these points well. But I must say that it’s typical of women to see this from only their vantage point. Men, too, are part of the equation. There are equally as many girls trying to take advantage of guys through sex. There are also women who refuse to reveal thoughts from the innermost recesses of their hearts and leave men wondering for too long. There are women who are in the mix just to enjoy it for themselves, not minding that the man seeks pleasure also. There are those women who give it up in a hope that the man will find them irresistible afterwards, or hasten a commitment to them. There are the women who wanna do a hit-and-run on the guy. Women, thou art complicated.
You said so yourself in the last line. But men are equally complicated. And I intend to tackle you people’s issues in another post. As for the girls that want different things, I’ll also enter their heads one day.
Great hints, but ehn woman dem worry ghon… Reading this will actually kill the libido of any man who is about to hit the sheets with a girl, It reels out pressure. Even if a man is able to deal with being a Mandingo that unclogs his Lays juice pipes. He is strung on dealing with the fact that she might just want to bring with her toothbrush and towel, That’s too much pressure, darn much pressure!
Hehehe…not every girl wants to bring her toothbrush and towel but she thinks about it. We think of the future; we want to know if the place will be a home for us. How we carry on after such thoughts shows the level of maturity and experience. So my point is if you treat her right in bed and attend to her heart, she creates a space for you in her heart.
This shouldn’t pressure any guy at all. He can simply tell her to go slow. And that would be an article for another day. This was just to let guys know what women ‘THINK about after sex’
believ it or not, mr uche evry gud girl thinks of her future if the guy touches her emotions. yes, we all think of the towel and toothbrush as sally said and if the pic ain’t right, there r chances we won’t come bk for more sex. i’m in my early 30s and I can’t be hopping frm one bed to another, I gas to settle down. so if I meet a guy, i’ll think of tomorrow. only sluts just want to fuck and go
Sally i seldom come accross gals with those thots,’pls do let me rest’ u know that kinda hoe remark? This days its all about the pay,what u can offer them and they get down wit u and its history,mayb its me or my enviroment,but sex doesnt mean anything this days but mere exercise,thanks 4 yur thoughts Sal
Maybe you keep meeting the wrong girls, Ustyn and i totally understand. Girls today are really out for what they can get from guys and it’s sad. But you know what, if a guy is straight and honest, he’ll find a good girl. That’s for sure. And this article was particularly about how the female mind in general works. Thanks for always stopping by
Av alwaiz bin a ghost reader, buh diz got me real hard omo sally u nailed the point every tym I av sex with ma bf I av a lot of tots going thru ma mind…once again tanxs 4 posting diz
Errrrm…I read this, darzall *runs and stops*…and I learnt what ‘she’ thinks that makes her act how she does after the ‘act’…*picks race Usain Bolt style*
Oh dear! This is sooo true
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