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Where To Find Breasts #19

Read previous episodes of Where To Find Breasts Fate. She hated it. It had shown her how cruel it could be. How it could snatch everything she had and leave her helpless. It reminded her about the powerlessness of humans. It was a foolish thing for anyone in the world to think they had control over their existence when they didn’t even choose the beginning of their lives. Mortality was as random as the thoughts passing through a toddler’s mind. All it took was two horny people to copulate and new life was made, bringing in another helpless mortal into world who would have no power over their existence. Every morning, humans woke up, not because they could, but because they were fitting into a script; one which didn’t grant them the ability to rewind time or jump into the future. They weren’t even granted the choice to pick…

Novocaine Knights #4

PREVIOUS EPISODES WURA Not today. Wura groaned and fought hard from stomping her foot in agitation. She was having a bad day already. First, she had had another of her nightmares. Second, Mahmud was yet to call her; it was a week since they last spoke and she had called twice and gotten an engaged line. Third, she was late for church. Fourth, an unsightly zit had popped up above her upper lip. Fifth, her skirt was a little too tight and she didn’t have a replacement. And sixth, her period appeared from the blue, which would explain the fourth and fifth. Jesus, why me? She groaned and took off her stained underwear. She flung it in a bucket in her bathroom and hurried out to the sitting room, a towel around her body. Checking to see that Kasi was nowhere in sight, she called out, “sanitary pad, anyone! Two…

Dear High Mistress #15

Sorry for the break in transmission. Busy weekend, plus no light and down with a cold. Finally bought fuel and now we can continue. Merry Christmas, fam. I know it doesn’t feel like Christmas for many of us, but hey, we’re still here. So enjoy the holiday as best as you can. This is dedicated to Uche Okolo. Happy birthday. Update on Stranger In Lagos… Don’t blame me, blame Okadabooks. We all await the launch of their new website. “I’ve told you to stop coming here, and stop bringing food to me as well. I’m fine, Salma.” Salma bit her lip. It was hard not to break down at the sight of Maliq. Standing behind the enquiries counter at the police station where he was held, he was all bruised and messed up from the famous brutality of the police. He could barely look at her as both eyes were…

MAKAYLA by Aturmercy

Makayla is 1 today. Yay! Happy Birthday, Darling! here’s a poem written by my dear friend, Aturmercy Makayla went to the bowls of hell and beyond Conquering where many have lost Overcoming all odds Standing proud, firm and tall Victory is Makayla! Demons from hell In this pure heart thought they could dwell They battled fiercely against this angel and lost The courage of this angel cannot be bought Courage is spelt M-a-k-a-y-l-a! Sworn to care, The Hippocratic Oath becomes a dare The betrayal of some quite clear Makayla rose above all their sneers A joy to her forebearsTriumphant is Makayla! In search of the meaning of victory I need look no further than Makayla Seeking for a reason to go on I find strength in Makayla A blessing truly is Makayla

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